Building Stamina and a Healthy Sex Life

Masturbation is a natural part of male sexuality that has been practiced for millennia. Yet, only in recent times has it been openly discussed as a healthy sex habit. Far from taboo, male masturbation and the use of male sex toys (like masturbators) can be empowering tools to improve sexual stamina, technique, and overall sexual well-being.

In this article, we’ll explore a brief history of male masturbation, the physiological and psychological benefits of regular self-pleasure, and some proven sex techniques for guys to build endurance.

We’ll also discuss how male sex toys, particularly male masturbators, can be used to train stamina and enhance both solo and partnered experiences. This educational, confidence-boosting guide will help you embrace masturbation as part of a balanced, fulfilling, and healthy sex life.

A Brief Historical and Cultural Overview

Masturbation has been with us since the dawn of humanity, and attitudes toward it have varied wildly across cultures and eras. In many ancient societies, self-pleasure was neither shameful nor secret. For example, the ancient Sumerians had remarkably relaxed views on sex and widely believed that masturbation enhanced sexual potency for both men and women, practicing it both alone and with partners.
They even worked it into their mythology – one legend describes the god Enki creating the Tigris and Euphrates rivers by masturbating and ejaculating into the empty riverbeds.

 In ancient Egypt, male masturbation was seen as a powerful creative act; the god Atum was believed to have formed the universe by masturbating to ejaculation. Such examples show that early cultures often recognized masturbation as a source of vitality or creation rather than something illicit.

Not all historical views were so positive. The ancient Greeks, for instance, had more complicated attitudes – some writers of the time regarded masturbation as an act for slaves or the uncivilized, implying that a “proper” civilized man would have a partner instead. Still, even in cultures that looked down on it publicly, masturbation likely continued in private.
It wasn’t until much later, however, that masturbation became the target of intense moral panic.

In the 18th century Enlightenment era, Western medical texts started pathologizing masturbation. Historian Thomas Laqueur noted that masturbation as a named “condition” or sin was essentially invented in 1713, when a tract called Onania described it as a new medical disease and moral failing.

This characterization unleashed a wave of guilt and fear around the act. By the Victorian era (19th century), anti-masturbation sentiment was at its peak in Europe and America, in line with the era’s sexual conservatism.
Moralists and even doctors of the time issued dire warnings about masturbation, blaming it for everything from blindness to madness.
For example, Dr. John Harvey Kellogg – the inventor of corn flakes and an especially zealous anti-masturbation crusader – claimed that “neither the plague, nor war, nor small-pox, nor similar diseases, have produced results so disastrous” as the habit of masturbation. This extreme stigma led to some drastic (and now shocking) “remedies.”

In the 1800s, various contraptions and treatments were marketed to curb masturbation. These ranged from chastity belts and electric shock gadgets to painful procedures like infibulation. Medical literature of the day even described using electric shocks and restraining devices to discourage masturbation. The prevailing belief was that self-pleasure sapped one’s vitality and health – a far cry from the views of ancient Sumerians or modern science.

Thankfully, attitudes have shifted dramatically in the last century.

The 20th-century sexual revolution, scientific research, and the influence of sex-positive education gradually dispelled many of the old myths.

Today, masturbation is largely recognized as a normal, healthy part of sexuality.
In fact, mainstream health authorities promote positive aspects of masturbation. According to WebMD and other experts, masturbation is now regarded as a normal, healthy sexual activity that is pleasant, fulfilling, acceptable, and safe.
Rather than a cause of illness, it’s understood to be a natural form of sexual expression.

Surveys confirm that the vast majority of people masturbate. One 2023 study found that over 80% of Americans masturbate, including over 90% of men who confidently practice this form of “healthy self-love”. Simply put, nearly every guy does it – and it’s usually a positive thing for your mind and body. In the sections ahead, we’ll see exactly why.

The Physiological and Psychological Benefits of Regular Masturbation

Regular masturbation and orgasm can yield a range of physiological benefits for men. To start, it’s one of the safest ways to enjoy sexual pleasure – there’s no risk of pregnancy or sexually transmitted infections when you’re solo. 
That alone makes it a worry-free outlet for sexual release. But beyond safety, masturbation has some direct health perks.

When you masturbate to orgasm, your body releases a cocktail of feel-good hormones and neurotransmitters, including endorphins, dopamine, and oxytocin. This chemical rush has real effects: it helps reduce stress and blood pressure while promoting relaxation.

Many men find that a masturbatory orgasm can relieve tension and even help with falling asleep, thanks to this natural relaxation response. Research backs up these anecdotal benefits – regular orgasms are linked to lower stress levels, improved mood, and better sleep quality for men.

There’s even some evidence that frequent ejaculation may have long-term health benefits.
For example, one Harvard Medical School publication notes that orgasm may help reduce the risk of heart disease and prostate cancer over time, though more research is needed. At the very least, we know orgasm is a form of cardiovascular exercise (your heart rate and blood flow increase during arousal), and it engages pelvic floor muscles which can strengthen with use. In short, masturbation can be a pleasurable way to support your overall sexual health.

The psychological benefits of masturbation are just as significant.
Sexual release is a natural stress reliever and mood booster.
It’s hard to feel anxious when those post-orgasm endorphins are flowing.

Masturbation can also contribute to feeling good about your body and sexuality. Taking time for self-pleasure reinforces the idea that your body is capable of giving and receiving pleasure, which can build positive self-esteem.

As Planned Parenthood notes, masturbation helps reduce stress and helps you understand your body better. Indeed, exploring your own anatomy and responses teaches you what you enjoy and what your arousal signals feel like.

This self-knowledge can translate into greater sexual confidence. Men who masturbate regularly often have an easier time communicating their needs and desires to a partner because they know what turns them on. It’s essentially a form of sexual practice or rehearsal in a no-pressure setting.

Another mental benefit: Masturbation can alleviate “performance pressure” in a way partnered sex might not.
Because you’re in complete control and there’s no one else to please, you can relax and focus on your own sensations. This can be especially helpful for men who experience anxiety about sexual performance or orgasming “too quickly.”

Dr. Sharon Bober, a sexual health expert, points out that masturbation helps reduce the stress of performance or climaxing within a certain timeframe, since you can take your time and go at your own pace. Without any expectations or fears of judgment, masturbation is a space where you can experiment, slow down or speed up as you like, and even laugh off any awkward moments – it’s just you. Over time, this freedom can carry over into partnered sex, making you less anxious and more in tune with your body.

Finally, it’s worth noting that masturbation isn’t in competition with your partnered sex life – it can actually complement it. Many relationship counselors encourage individuals to maintain some solo sexual time as a form of self-care.
It releases pent-up sexual tension, which can prevent frustration from building if partners have mismatched libidos or schedules.

Rather than something that detracts from intimacy with your partner, healthy solo play can enhance your sex life by keeping your sexual energy positive and by helping you show up to partnered encounters more relaxed, confident, and knowledgeable about your own pleasure. All these benefits set the stage for why incorporating tools like male sex toys can be so useful, especially when it comes to stamina and endurance.

How Male Masturbators Can Help Build Stamina and Endurance

One particular area where masturbation can pay dividends is in sexual stamina – in other words, lasting longer and having better control during sex. Many men worry about finishing too quickly or not being able to sustain their arousal as long as they or their partner might like.

This is where using male sex toys, especially male masturbators, can be a game-changer. A male masturbator is a sex toy designed for penis stimulation, often a sleeve, cup, or device that simulates intercourse. By incorporating these toys into your solo routine, you can essentially train yourself for better endurance in bed.

Think of it like athletic training: if partnered sex is analogous to running a race, then masturbation (sometimes called “solo sex”) can serve as your practice runs. 
Using a masturbator adds realism and variety to those practice sessions.
A basic masturbation sleeve or toy provides sensations (like tightness, suction, or textures) that mimic the feeling of penetrative sex more closely than your hand alone.

This can help you acclimate to intense stimulation and learn to control your arousal in a situation that feels similar to actual intercourse. Over time, practicing with a toy can raise your arousal threshold, meaning it might take longer and more stimulation before you reach orgasm – a sign of increased stamina.

A sleeve-style male masturbator.

These toys provide added stimulation and allow men to practice controlling their arousal with sensations similar to intercourse.

By using a masturbator regularly, you can attempt to extend the duration of your solo sessions, gradually pushing your “edge” further.

For example, you might start by masturbating with the toy for a few minutes longer than usual before climax.
Each session, try to last a bit longer, or bring yourself close to orgasm multiple times and back off (a technique we’ll detail shortly).

The textured interior of a sleeve or the rhythmic contractions of an automatic masturbator can challenge you in new ways, teaching your body to handle different levels of stimulation. Men who only ever use their hand might get very accustomed to one specific sensation, but a toy can introduce new sensations that broaden your comfort zone.

This sensitivity training ultimately contributes to endurance – you won’t be overwhelmed as quickly when feeling something different during partner sex, because you’ve “been there” during solo practice.

In addition, some male sex toys can help address specific endurance issues.
For instance, if maintaining an erection is a concern (perhaps you lose firmness if intercourse goes on for a while), certain toys like vibratory sleeves can actually help maintain erection strength by increasing stimulation.
Stronger, more consistent arousal means you’re less likely to go soft mid-session, allowing you and your partner to enjoy longer lovemaking.

Other devices, like penis rings or vacuum pumps, can be used in conjunction with masturbation to build erectile endurance and confidence, though those are beyond our scope here.

The main idea is that masturbators can act as training tools: they make solo sex more engaging and can simulate challenges that occur during real sex, so you can practice overcoming them on your own.

Sex therapists sometimes even recommend strategic masturbation to improve stamina. For example, the Mayo Clinic suggests that masturbating an hour or two before intercourse may help delay ejaculation during partnered sex.
This preemptive release can take the edge off your arousal, so you last longer in the next round.

While that’s a short-term tactic, consistently working with a masturbator can produce more lasting improvements in ejaculatory control.

In fact, the market recognizes how useful this is – some male sex toys are explicitly marketed as “stamina training units,” highlighting the common desire among men to boost endurance.

Whether or not you use those specific products, the underlying concept is accessible to anyone: use masturbation (with or without toys) as stamina training.
When done mindfully, you’re essentially teaching your body and brain new tricks, like how to not climax as soon as sexual pleasure builds to a high point.

In the next section, we’ll look at specific techniques to maximize these training sessions and turn them into real improvements in control, timing, and sensitivity awareness.

Techniques for Building Control, Timing, and Sensitivity

So, how exactly can you use masturbation – especially with the help of a toy – to build better control over your orgasms and improve your timing?

Here are a few proven sex techniques for men that focus on stamina and arousal control. These methods are often recommended by sex therapists for issues like premature ejaculation, but any man can use them to increase endurance and learn more about his body’s responses.

• The Stop-Start “Edging” Technique:
  This is the classic stamina-building exercise.
  Begin masturbating (with your hand or a masturbator) as you normally would. When you notice yourself approaching the point of no return – those telltale signs that orgasm is imminent – stop stimulation. Take a deep breath and let the intense urge subside. After a short pause (once your arousal has dialed down a bit), start stimulating yourself again. Repeat this cycle of edging (rising toward climax, then stopping) multiple times before finally allowing yourself to finish. This technique essentially trains you to linger in the mid-range of sexual excitement instead of racing to the finish. By practicing the stop-start method, you’ll become much more aware of your arousal level at any given moment. Over time, you’ll gain the ability to hold yourself right below your climax threshold for longer periods. In other words, you build control like a muscle. Research confirms this: such behavioral interventions (like stop-start) teach men to carefully attend to their level of arousal and manage it confidently, without fear, which can greatly increase their sense of ejaculatory control. Tip: While doing edging exercises, you can incorporate the “squeeze technique” as well – gently squeezing the base or head of the penis when you stop can further diminish the urge to climax, though it’s optional. The main goal is to repeatedly experience approaching a climax and then back off, which raises your tolerance for high arousal.

• Vary the Stimulation (Slow Down and Lighten Up):
  Another technique to build stamina is learning to modulate the intensity of stimulation, rather than stopping completely. This is easier to practice with a toy because you can simply pause thrusting or reduce motion, without having to remove your hand entirely. As you masturbate and feel yourself getting close to orgasm, try changing the speed or pressure instead of a full stop. For example, if you’re using a stroker sleeve, slow your thrusts down significantly, or pause with the toy just resting around you without moving. You might also switch to very light touches. The idea is to keep yourself stimulated just enough to stay aroused but not enough to tip over the edge. By riding this plateau, you learn fine control over your arousal. You could think of it like a car: rather than slamming on the brakes, you’re gently easing off the gas to cruise at a manageable speed. This technique builds what we can call sensitivity awareness – you become finely attuned to how each change in speed or pressure affects your arousal. Experts advise that practicing this helps you identify and become familiar with the intermediate levels of sexual excitement, not just “off” or “on” full blast. That awareness is key to lasting longer, because you can detect when you’re at a 7 out of 10 arousal and consciously stay there, instead of unintentionally going from 7 to 10 too fast.

• Practice with Different Sensations and Conditions:
  Our bodies can get very used to a specific routine. If you always masturbate the exact same way – say, fast and with a tight grip – your body might become conditioned to only that pattern, which can actually make it harder to control in a different scenario. It’s useful to mix up your solo play conditions as training. Using a masturbator toy is one great way to introduce new sensations (textures, suction, vibration). You can also try masturbating sometimes with lubricant and sometimes without. (In fact, one stamina exercise program suggests starting without lube to reduce sensation while you build initial control, then gradually adding lube in later to increase sensation as your control improves. Experiment with different strokes or grip strengths. Occasionally change your positions – for example, masturbate lying on your back one day and standing up another, since body position can alter how stimulation feels. The goal here is to avoid a situation where your body only knows one route to ejaculation. By diversifying your masturbation habits, you’ll be less prone to losing control when something differs during partner sex. You’ll also learn which kinds of touch or movement make you most excited, which is valuable knowledge. This broad experience builds stamina by strengthening your ability to handle a variety of sexual stimuli without automatically climaxing.

• Mindful Breathing and Mental Focus:
  While physical techniques are important, don’t overlook the mental component of stamina. Often, arousal can skyrocket because we get mentally carried away or anxious. Practicing mindfulness during masturbation can help. Pay attention to your breathing – if you notice it becoming very rapid and shallow as you near orgasm, consciously slow it down and breathe deeply into your belly. This can actually reduce the tension that's building toward ejaculation. Some men find that briefly focusing their mind on something non-sexual (without totally losing arousal) can help back them away from the brink; you might, for instance, suddenly think about the rhythm of your breath or briefly take in your surroundings, then return focus to the pleasurable feelings once you’ve regained a calmer state. The point is to stay in touch with your body’s signals. Masturbation is a great time to practice this because you can close your eyes, eliminate distractions, and really tune in to the gradual rise of excitement. As you become more mindful, you’ll start to notice the subtle cues that you’re approaching climax – maybe a certain tightening in your muscles or that your breathing speeds up. This kind of sensitivity and self-awareness acts like an early warning system, so you can apply the stop-start or slow-down techniques at just the right moment. By mastering control over both the physical and mental aspects of arousal, you set yourself up to last longer and feel more in control during partnered sex as well.

Practicing these techniques regularly (a few times a week, if possible) can lead to real improvements.
Be patient with yourself – building stamina is a gradual process, much like building any other endurance.
Some days you might not last as long as you hoped, but consistency is what brings progress.

Over a number of weeks, you’ll likely notice that you can edge for several minutes longer than when you started. Celebrate those wins! Improved stamina not only enhances your confidence, but it can also open up new possibilities during sex (like more varied positions or longer foreplay) since you’re not rushing to climax.

Solo and Partnered Play: Incorporating Masturbation Toys into Your Sex Life

Masturbation and male sex toys aren’t just for when you’re alone – they can also be a fun and beneficial part of partnered sexual experiences. Incorporating toys in both solo and partnered play can add novelty, increase pleasure, and even improve communication between partners. Here’s how embracing these tools can enhance your intimate life:

Solo Play Enrichment:
First and foremost, using masturbators or other male sex toys on your own is a form of self-care and sexual exploration. Rather than viewing it as something lesser than partner sex, recognize that solo play with toys can actually make you a better lover. It’s a safe space to learn what you like and to try new techniques (as we discussed above).

When you discover a particular stroke or pressure that feels amazing with your toy, you can guide your partner to try something similar during intercourse or foreplay. In this way, your solo sessions become research and development for your couple’s play.

 Moreover, taking care of your own sexual needs through masturbation can relieve pressure on a relationship. If your partner has a different libido or is unavailable (due to travel, illness, etc.), you can still satisfy yourself and stay attuned to your sexuality, so that no one feels frustrated.

Knowing that you have this outlet can remove any sense of desperation or urgency when you do come together with a partner – you’re there because you want to, not because you’re unbearably pent-up.

Many men report that after a healthy solo release, they approach their partner with a more relaxed, attentive mindset, rather than a single-minded focus on getting off. Thus, solo toy play can indirectly lead to more mindful, connected partnered sex.

Partnered Play and Foreplay:
Bringing a male masturbator into partner play might sound unconventional to some, but it can actually be a big turn-on and a helpful aid. 
Couples can use a masturbator sleeve or similar toy as part of their foreplay routine. For example, your partner might use the toy on you as you lie back and enjoy, or you could use it on yourself while they watch, and then switch to intercourse. 

Masturbating alongside your partner or enlisting their help can increase excitement for both people. Some partners enjoy watching their significant other experience pleasure; it can be arousing and informative (they can see what techniques you use on yourself). This mutual masturbation scenario can create a sense of intimacy and vulnerability that strengthens your connection.

It’s also a great option for times when intercourse isn’t possible or desired – say, one partner is temporarily not in the mood for penetrative sex, or there’s an issue like vaginal discomfort. The other partner can still be involved by using a toy on the man, ensuring both partners remain sexually satisfied and close.

Using a toy together can also remove some pressure from performance in partnered sex. For instance, if a man tends to climax quickly during intercourse, the couple could agree to take a break partway and have the partner use the masturbator on him for a while as a way to slow things down.
Because the sensations are different from intercourse, it might help him regroup and last longer when they resume actual sex.

Alternatively, if the male partner needs extra stimulation to reach orgasm (which can happen with fatigue or certain medications), a vibrating masturbator or sleeve used by either partner can provide that needed boost.

In fact, many kinds of sex devices are specifically designed to increase stimulation and help maintain erections, and they can be incorporated into foreplay seamlessly. For example, a vibrating penis sleeve can be used before or during foreplay to heighten arousal. The key is to approach these toys as additions to your shared sexual repertoire, not as replacements for either of you.

Enhancing Pleasure and Novelty:
Introducing a toy can make long-term relationships feel new and exciting again.
It’s something different and can lead to a lot of playful experimentation.

Maybe you challenge your partner to see how long they can use the toy on you before you orgasm, turning it into a fun game (which ties back into that stamina training!).

Or you use the toy in combination with other activities – for example, your partner might use the masturbator on you while you perform a different kind of stimulation on them, allowing both to feel pleasure simultaneously.

The possibilities are endless once you drop any embarrassment and treat it lightheartedly. Couples who communicate openly about such things often find that incorporating toys brings them closer. You both have to talk about boundaries, what feels good, what you’d like to try – these conversations can deepen trust and understanding in the relationship.

Plus, using toys together sends a powerful message: that both partners are committed to each other’s pleasure and willing to explore new avenues to keep sex enjoyable and satisfying.

Balancing Solo and Partnered Sex:
It’s important to strike a healthy balance.
Solo masturbation (with or without toys) and partner sex don’t detract from each other – they complement each other when approached with the right mindset.
If you communicate with your partner, you can ensure neither of you feels threatened or replaced by a toy or by solo play. In fact, many partners encourage each other’s masturbation as a way to maintain sexual health.

For instance, if a man is working on stamina through edging practice on his own, his partner ultimately benefits from the results in their shared sex life. Likewise, a partner might use their own toys; both of you having a comfort with self-pleasure can reduce feelings of sexual pressure in the relationship.

The end goal is that masturbation and partnered sex each become fulfilling experiences that support one another. When you have an active solo practice, you might find you’re even more excited for partner intimacy (absence makes the heart grow fonder, after all, even if it’s just a day or two apart).

And when you have satisfying sex with your partner, you might incorporate what you learned solo, making that private practice feel worthwhile and rewarding.

Embracing a Balanced, Fulfilling Sex Life

Incorporating masturbation and male sex toys into your routine can be a positive step toward a more balanced and fulfilling sex life.

The historical shame surrounding male masturbation has given way to a much healthier understanding: it’s a normal, beneficial activity that can improve your physical health, boost your mood, and sharpen your sexual skills.

By regularly engaging in self-pleasure, you not only enjoy immediate pleasures (like stress relief and orgasmic bliss) but also invest in your long-term sexual wellness – building stamina, learning control, and gaining confidence in your body. Male sex toys like masturbators are valuable allies in this journey. Far from being gimmicks, they serve as effective tools for stamina training and adding variety to your solo and partnered experiences.

As with any aspect of sexuality, communication and moderation are key.
If you have a partner, discuss these topics openly: you might be surprised at how supportive and even curious they are.
There’s no need for masturbation to be a secret shame; in a trusting relationship, it can be just another facet of your intimate lives.

And if you’re single, masturbation is a wonderful way to maintain a satisfying sex life and prepare yourself for future partners. It ensures that your sexual satisfaction doesn’t depend on someone else’s availability – you are fully capable of meeting your own needs in a healthy way.

Finally, remember that a fulfilling sex life is a holistic one.
Stamina and endurance are useful, but they’re not the only measures of good sex.
Don’t get so focused on lasting longer that you forget to enjoy the moment.
The techniques and toy usage described here are meant to enhance pleasure and confidence, not create new anxieties. Take it at your own pace.

Over time, you’ll likely find that embracing masturbation (and perhaps some handy gadgets) as part of your routine leads to improvements not just in how long you last, but in how much you enjoy all aspects of sex. You’ll have better knowledge of your body, less stress and shame, more creativity in the bedroom, and a comfortable outlet for sexual expression whenever you need it. All of that adds up to a more satisfying, well-rounded, and empowered sex life.

So go forth and explore – your body and your partner (current or future) will thank you for it.